Monday, 19 January 2009

Lutaworm.

Well, the bloody cheek of it. J A S will neither be writing about common dogs, common sex nor that GODFORSAKEN PLACE, KOLSKY. FB swore me down she would not mention that whole episode again. (See previous post.)

Instead, today's post is altogether more important and quite literally life changing. 

Lutaworm

This refers to unkempt eyebrows- those that grow in any which way and are never ever seen to. This crime is on a par with bitten fingernails and nasal hair. 

When just a young whippersnapper I went for a job interview and was asked to present my hands- so they could be checked for bitten fingernails. All this for a job working with the mentally ill, whom I am sure had better things to worry about, other than the state of my nice clean and neatly clipped nails.

Eyebrows are another thing altogether. They grow and creep out of shape hair by hair. As any eyebrow technician will tell you, even the superfine hairs can make a difference- over pluck these and your once Khaloesque mono-brow will become something out of Dietrich's dressing room. Personally I prefer to restrict my high arches to my feet rather than my face. However by simply removing excess growth, a person's net value career wise, can be doubled or even trebled, though do be careful that they don't give you a permanent look of surprise.

AVOID LUTAWORMS CREEPING ACROSS YOUR FACE AT ALL COSTS!


1 comment:

  1. Oh fabulous!!! Bra-vo! So glad for the laugh this morning. (should be packing but couldn't help myself, had to read)

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